Answering “YES” to any one of the questions indicates an elevated risk for homicide:

• Has the violence escalated in frequency or severity in the past few months?
• Has your partner ever threatened to kill you, himself or someone else?
• Is there a gun in the house?
• Has your partner ever used a weapon to hurt you?
• Has your partner ever tried to choke you?
• Does your partner regularly use drugs or alcohol?

Being alert to a life-threatening situation does not mean we must “rescue” the victim or demand she take certain action – to do so replicates the power and control dynamic experienced with the abuser. However, we should provide clarity by reviewing the situation with her. Some examples:

“While is your decision, no, staying while you try to work it out does not sound safe to me. I want you to look at what has happened. He has already broken your arm. He has threatened to kill you. He has several guns in the house. I really wish things were different, but I don’t think you can afford to wait around.”